How do I get over my extreme anxiety and embarrassment about my birthmark and scars?

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I have 19 years, female, bisexual, a college student, and when I was 15 or 16 until around my 18th birthday, I was a self-Harmer. Still I have many scars on his arms and legs at the time. Also I have a pretty ugly birthmark on my stomach, just above the navel. It is a rare type of birthmark that is not presented until puberty, due to the release of many hormones does show. So you've been spending more and more color and spotting as I had (which first appeared when he was 16 or 17 and was very small at first). The mole is uneven, irregular, high / irregular, stained, has multiple colors darker than my normal skin tone, is about 3 inches long and 1 inch wide, and has a part of her that is a scar lazer burn a medical procedure in several parts (in case you did not become something benign) to remove it. However, I think my family insurance changed or something and now as insurance does not cover it and I can not afford to have the procedure is complete. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus My friends, dates and random people I meet when I'm out (I live in New York) tell me I'm too hot, and it worked, so I'm pretty sure my physical body as a whole. I'm also pretty sure personality wise. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus However, I have this intense anxiety about my scars and my birthmark that gradually has festered into a full blown phobia of sex and naked to others. He's been getting progressively worse (not sure if this is related to the progression of the birthmark or just pass the time). I had sex with about 5 or 6 people in my life. About a third of half of them was dating and the rest were only connections. I have not had sex in a year or two, because this phobia has gotten so bad. And it seems that the longer I go without sex, the more fear and anxiety builds up on it. Right now I have a few people I'm interested and want to be able to potentially connect with at least one of them. I've done with some people while I was in college this year, but I'm too afraid to go further. This creates a strange feeling, sometimes because I'll be with someone who I am very attracted, and who is attracted to me too, but I will not make a move because I fear it will end in sex, and although I really to have sex with them, anxiety prevents me from any action. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus When I was about 11 or 12 years old, was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and social anxiety / phobia. Although I'm almost miraculously tons better now, due to years of fighting and pushing myself, I'm hitting the wall and I can not find a way to overcome it. I've had a history of anxiety during sex that has made my sex life difficult at times and now with this birthmark, it has become much worse. I do not like people to know that I have a birthmark so even change affect me in front of others, wearing a bathing suit, skinny dipping, etc. I have mostly overcome my anxiety about my scars remaining my self-injury days, as people can see that I'm fully clothed, but since I have the option to hide the birthmark on my stomach, I have developed an aversion to being around other shirtless. I always dread that hypothetical moment during sex when the other person see my birth mark for the first time, and is potentially upset by it or confused as to what it is. I used to be very proud of my abs and flat stomach, but now I feel that this birthmark removed the appeal of my stomach. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Anyway, I feel this is so long, I've never seeked help for this and I can not talk about it, taking over my life in a way that I can live longer. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus If anyone has any advice on how to overcome this extreme anxiety, would be sooo grateful. I can not avoid sex forever and I do not know what else to do.

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